Alright, so I decided it was time to get clothes that fit. Clothes that actually touch my skin. Since winter is coming - even though this is Texas and it is totally hit and miss with winter weather - and I have no sweaters I figured now was a good time to get some clothes for the upcoming season. JcPenney's, Sears, and Kohl's are having good sales by the way (I got some sweaters for $16 that are normally $44 - which is how I justify having spent so much money).
I used to not like shopping. I didn't like looking at myself in the mirror period, so why would I want to look at myself in clothes that I went up a size or two in and that were made for skinny people but only had fabric added so they fit "plus" sized people very awkwardly? It took way too much time to find what did look good on me. I'm one of those get in and get out people. Very anti-girl of me, I know. I don't like looking looking and never finding. It's a waste of time to me.
Yesterday however I spent 2.5 hours in JcPenney's. I kid you not. Which is a lot of time when you haven't had dinner and your tummy is growling at you and to hurry up. And why did it take so long? Because I had to go back for new sizes to try on! But the good news is I went DOWN in sizes! I got my sweaters in a medium! A MEDIUM!!!! I haven't been that size since middle school! And my pants - wait for it - are a size 16! That is six dresses sizes smaller than when I started! AND it's one size smaller than when I graduated high school!
A friends response? To say wow! what a change! Which is true. But I said you should see it from this side! It's exciting, new, and scary! The way I see myself HAS to change. I still see myself as huge. Do you know what I hate? I hate that if you ask me for my flaws I can give you a list as long as Santa's naughty and nice list in 5 minutes flat but if you ask me for a quality that I like about myself I need 5 minutes just to think of one. That doesn't seem right to me.
So starting now, I am taking 2 minutes to look at myself after I don't like what I see to look past the first impression of bad and see something I do like.
Oh, and one more tip: Don't shop alone! Totally hard to celebrate without someone there.
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