Goals - do we need them?

Ok, my cycle instructor is definitely a pain in my butt tonight!! So I'm watching a movie, wincing everytime I move and so exhausted that I'm really not paying attention to the movie because I'm trying not to fall asleep.  And I'm slightly bored and wanting to change my status on facebook every five minutes just to see who will like the status and who will comment on the status.  Be honest, you know you have done that too!!

So that's when I decided maybe it's time to post my next blog.  So what's been on my mind lately? My goal. Honesty time - I now weigh 207 pounds! Since my documented peak was 315 and my official starting weight was 301 this is a huge accomplishment. I think I weighed this much when I graduated high school. The difference is that I'm in better shape now. I can see muscles that I know I've never had before. It's all very exciting!

I decided a few monthes ago that I wanted my weight to start with a 1 by my birthday.  Even if it's 199.9...but if it's less than that I won't complain.  September 25 is the deadline. 16 days from now. That's half a pound a day to lose. That means I have to eat 1,750 calories less than the amount of calories I burn every day. I love being an accountant but that's an overwhelming amount of math for me to do everyday. Just saying.

And then that stupid little voice inside my head says what if you don't make the goal? What will all that hard work have been for? You are going to fail!

But then I remember what my mom said when I told her my goal and worried then if I couldn't make it....she said what if you can??

So like other steps of faith with my Lord, I say I will go to the gym everyday. Do my best everyday. And give the Glory and results to God.  If I don't make the goal it will be ok. Life will continue. Gym will continue to be a daily thing. My family and friends won't love me any less - this is a direct order! And no one will be disappointed in me.  I will not be disappointed in myself (sounds good on paper but I promise to keep telling myself this and work on not feeling disappointed).  I will walk away knowing I gave my all and I did my part.

I will remember how far I've come. I will remember that there is more to come. I will remember that not one, not two but three ladies have told me they are going to buy me new pants that actually fit so they can see what size I really am.  And I will remember that I did not fail, I've succeeded in changing my life. And I will continue on that journey. I might go eat a skinny cow ice cream sandwich first but I will continue!